Well, today was a dreary fucking day. Not like, emotionally or anything like that...but the whether was just plain nasty, in that limbo between rain and misting. It rained enough to be really irritating, but not enough to actually make me use an umbrella. It was just an altogether dreary, grey day. I took a long walk all the way down to Harvard Law School (15 minutes or so), made quick stops at the financial aid and career services offices, and then promptly left campus to do something more productive (like scurry back to the Dunkin' Donuts I walked past on the way there). That just about sums up my day though. I walked for about 3 hours...rented Weeds and the finale of Arrested Development at Blockbuster, passed out on my bed trying to watch TV in the middle of the afternoon, ate dinner with my landlady, and here I am...posting about the mundanity of it all...just biding my time 'til I start watching Weeds.
I'm not really sure what to make of tomorrow. Clearly, I'm apprehensive. I don't like groups of people. I don't like introducing myself. I don't like running out of things to say. I really don't like making small talk. I don't like looking at groups of people who have segregated themselves into small groups of conversation so that it's impossible to talk to people. I hate being in situations where I am expected to be social and meet people...and I hate being acutely aware of my distaste for all of these things. In reality, things have always been ok. Duke turned out fine, India turned out fine, Wash U turned out spectacularly, and now is just another step. I just hate it. In any case, I'm going to get some sleep (after watching TV) and grit my teeth and get through it. Maybe I'll come back stunned and excited about the upcoming year, and maybe I'll come home with such a sense of relief that the fiasco is over and that I won't have to deal with it until Sept. 6. Who knows. But I guess we'll all find out tomorrow, won't we?
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