Scalia

So I went to see a Scalia Q&A today, as Harvard is celebrating his 20 years on the Court with dinners, events, and this afternoon's "A Conversation with Justice Antonin Scalia."

The room was packed, and overflowed into another huge auditorium...and the room was filled with the loud chattering of any auditorium. I spent the hour reading my Corporations and looking around the room, and confirmed, again, that I don't really like it here all that much. (Why? I noticed a lot of expensive clothing...which always puts me off. And it's not when someone buys a nice suit or a few nice things, or even owns all nice things...it's when seemingly everyone wears all nice things that annoys me. And not even really interesting nice things...but normal things, in the more expensive version. Like a 200 dollar dress shirt type shit.) Anyway, I digress. And in walks a group of people, with a short, chubby man who waddles just a little, and the silence is immediate. Awesome.

Anyway, Scalia is really a remarkable man. I think he's wrong of course, but he's got an intellectually defensible position that brilliantly binds philosophical consistency to conservative outcomes, though that's apparently just a fortunate side effect (ie. destroying the legacy of the Warren Court). In essence, he deflects all questions of substance with method. And it just so happens that the method would probably result in substance closely aligned with his own beliefs. I won't really go into what he actually discussed, but the man is certainly eloquent, witty, and very charismatic. (And short. And rotund.)

The only point he put across that I still can't get around is that the most important and pressing issues in our lives should not be placed into the hands of lawyers. That is, legal practice and lawyering provides no institutional competence for decision-making. This isn't a new problem that's just been revealed to me, but my distrust for the competence lawyers is a hurdle I can't get over.

And of course, when you open the floor to student questions, it can be annoying. As expected, a shrill global warming activist decided to try and deliver an opening statement about global warming with all of the fear-mongering imagery and moral coercion nakedly revealed...which, as usual, was as profoundly unhelpful as can be imagined. I've noticed a phenomenon since arriving here and watching speakers...the crazies always stand up with a piece of paper with crap scrawled all over it...and as they begin talking, you can sense the beginning of a speech, and as the "question" gets longer and more awkward, their voices start to go flat and they read stupid cliche statements in the same stupid voice as they lose eye contact with the target and bury their faces in the handscrawled notes. This is the 8th time this has happened since I arrived. (If you count the 7 that happened at the WTO speech)

The rest of the 15 questions were the same question, over and over again: "Doesn't (blank) prove that originalism is wrong?" The blanks ranged from technological change to Brown v. BoE, to the meaning of language...and whatever else. Essentially, we spent an hour attacking Scalia's originalism, and he spent an hour deftly stomping down every single argument.

In any case, I'm bored and decided to just post something.

The Nazi Taboo

I just read a really fascinating article in Slate discussing the taboo against comparing any modern event to Nazism or the Third Reich. I highly recommend checking out the article (even though, as the article points out, any comparison to Nazism will immediately evoke an eye-rolling, "jesus christ here we go again"-type response. I promise the article's not like that.) But if you don't check it out, here's a few passages that really struck me:

The taboo [of comparing ourselves to the Third Reich] is itself a precept of the propaganda state. Usually its enforcers profess a politically correct motive: the exceptionalism of genocidal Jewish victimhood. Thus, poor Sen. Richard Durbin, the Democrat from Illinois, found himself apologizing to the Anti-Defamation League after Republicans jumped all over him for invoking Nazi Germany to describe the conditions at Guantanamo. And so by allowing the issue to be defined by the unique suffering of the Jews, we ignore the Holocaust's more universal hallmark: the banal ordinariness of the citizens who perpetrated it. The relevance of Third Reich Germany to today's America is not that Bush equals Hitler or that the United States government is a death machine. It's that it provides a rather spectacular example of the insidious process by which decent people come to regard the unthinkable as not only thinkable but doable, justifiable. Of the way freethinkers and speakers become compliant and self-censoring. Of the mechanism by which moral or humanistic categories are converted into bureaucratic ones. And finally, of the willingness with which we hand control over to the state and convince ourselves that we are the masters of our destiny.

* * *

And so it was under the open-ended emergency created by 9/11 that Bush's Military Commissions Act, passed in September, gave the president authority to designate anyone he so deemed, citizen or no, an 'unlawful enemy combatant' and, habeas corpus having been nullified, send noncitizens away indefinitely.

In an interview on MSNBC the day the bill was signed, Jonathan Turley, constitutional law professor at George Washington University, declared the date one of the most infamous in the history of the republic, and amazed at the "national yawn" greeting this "huge sea change for our democracy." Where was the public consternation about this reversal of our founding principles? That interested me more than the brazen coup of the administration—which Carl Schmitt might argue was a categorical imperative. Why had the decent people of the country mounted no serious protest even against something as on-its-face objectionable as the bill's sanction of torture?

My Relationship.

After corporations today, where a guest lecturer came in and talked about the new trends in Mergers and Acquisitions, I messaged AHJ to note that (even though I suck at it) corporate law and M&A has some interesting aspects to it...and after a few exchanges back and forth on the topic, we ended with four messages, but four messages that I believe nicely exemplify the relationship:

AHJ: Gunner.

Me: White.

AHJ: Love you

Me: Love you too

(And off we went in our respective schedules)


Now that's a foundation.

Quick Update.

I'm starting to get increasingly harried and freaked out about exams, because, all exaggerations aside...I totally blew off this semester compared to the past. I'm a total of 15 days behind (if you count all the days I've not prepared)...and I simply don't know what's going on in Corporations still. I think I can figure International Trade and Chinese Law out...but this Corps stuff is killing me.

A coupla things:

1) Thanksgiving was fantastic. Just awesome. Not necessarily Thanksgiving itself, but the 6 days of not working, eating, watching (and rewatching) TV shows with AHJ, sleeping in her apartment, seeing old friends, being back in St. Louis...etc. Definitely good.

2) I accepted an offer today...I'll be working at Davis Polk & Wardwell this summer. Not entirely clear on why I accepted, except that I used their name whenever people asked me where I was going when I called to reject their offers. (I'm going to take down the firm name tomorrow or the day after, because, as I learned this weekend...certain individuals, and probably institutions, Google their names or the names of their Jewish sons...leading them to this blog and believing ever after that I am an anti-semite. see picture below, apparently that's me now.)

Ahh my Bangalore No More.

Amongst the various emails I receive from India from ex-co-workers, children, and other buddies, they've all alerted me to a recent change in Bangalore. Not because anything really happened to it...but merely because Bangalore has gone the route of all of the other major Indian cities and decided to adopt a more Indian name for the city (ie. Bombay-->Mumbai, Calcutta-->Kolkata, Madras-->Chennai, and just for shits and giggles to demonstrate the humor....Trivandum --> Thiruvananthapuram (pronounced Thiruvananthapuram.))

Thus, from now on, and forevermore, Bangalore will be known henceforth as...

Bengalooru ("boiled beans")

Which is basically, although not precisely, Bangalore-oo. Well done on the poverty, AIDS, and economic policy Bengalooru. Your democracy is functioning well and your priorities are spot-on!

Fuck you and your guns.

Nothing in particular behind this post...I was just reading the news and noticed, as usual, three stories about gun violence. One involved 5 people being shot in 10 minutes, with two dead. Another involved thugs robbing and shooting people waiting in line for PS3, and the last involves some other jackass going postal and shooting his boss in the parking lot.

Why on earth do we grant the explicit right of life or death to every single person we meet? It's not like trusting other people to drive cars, and being aware that they could end our lives at any moment...because cars serve a function besides killing people. Guns exist solely to end life, or threaten to end life.

What is it going to take before we do something about guns? We're not gonna stop people from killing each other with more conventional weapons (O.J. Simpson), but we sure as shit reduce the impact of moron dirt-bag thugs robbing gamer dorks in line at a Wal-Mart, or preventing a disgruntled loser from walking into his workplace and randomly killing people. Is there some sort of breaking point that will actually make these douchebags believe in gun control? (I guess it took a bullet to the head for Brady to become a gun-control activist...) Couldn't we turn the resources on parts of this ridiculous war on drugs to a war on gun violence or availability?

It's not even that all guns should be banned all the time for everybody...but we don't even ban assault rifles?! ASSAULT RIFLES!?!? (of course, freely available at gun shows.)

Ugh. Buncha fuckin assholes.

Just in case you hadn't heard...

This is honestly the amazon listing for O.J. Simpson's forthcoming book "If I Did It", which apparently contains graphic and "chillingly accurate and realistic" descriptions of what happened and how he murdered his wife and Ron Brown...which is considered to be a true factual confession of the murder. I just wanted to post a picture of the cover if you hadn't heard of it yet. It's awesome.

No one will care...but...

I know that I am easily influenced by my classes. As I was super into con law last year, and I read financial stuff now because I understand the accounting of it...and now international trade law...but here's something very interesting that I found on the WTO website...

Historic Complaint For "History's Biggest Subsidy"
Six developing nations have lodged a complaint against the US, calling the Iraq War "history's biggest illegal trade subsidy" and "market distortion on a gargantuan scale." "In a free market, companies like Halliburton and Exxon should be funding their own market expansion projects instead of depending on their government for help," said a spokesperson for the consortium.

I'm gonna need to think about it some more...but that's a fascinating claim to make. (even tho my understanding of the WTO charter would probably allow this to fall under the "National Security" exception...which the dispute resolution body wouldn't dare to challenge and enforce for fear of destroying its political capital and legitimacy).

Wah wah wah.

(Whining Post about law school)

Monday was my first Hah-vahd law exam. And it was a pass-fail. The good thing about pass-fail exams is that the threshold for passing is incredibly low. As described by my professor, we have to actively try to fail in order to fail. (He's the little old guy in the middle.)

The bad thing about pass-fail exams is that failing them is simply not an option, forcing you to drive yourself nuts making sure you don't fail the damn thing while simultaneously trying to motivate yourself to really sink your teeth into material you're acutely aware you don't need to sorry about. Of course I freaked out.

Anyway, busted my tail for solid 3 days over the weekend, arrived in the exam...and I believe I passed it. So that's the good news. We shall see whether or not my cursory glance at the actual question and fact pattern was completely off-track...The main issue, however, is that I put off all my work over the weekend to ensure that I passed this bitch.

The complication is that today I was scheduled to be "on panel" for my corporations class. What that means is that the professor, way ahead of time, schedules certain individuals who will be "on call" for the whole day. (This is him by the way.)
This means that you don't get surprised by randomly getting called on, but also that there is no excuse for not knowing the material. It's your fuckin' day. You knew it was coming. Which means that I had to prepare. In triplicate. So, with a sense of ease at 4:00 p.m., as soon as I got out of the exam, I thought I'd get started on it and just take my time with it...and do some extra background reading in some hornbooks or something (because seriously, I don't know what the fuck is going on in that class half the time. It's filled with stupid mid-career EU bastards who have taught EU corporate law are sitting in my class next to the most brilliant legal mind in India, who are sitting next to the hedge-fund investment bankers and MBAs...who all end up driving the class towards issues and a level of understanding I simply don't have because I'm not a fuckin CEO.) In addiiton, today was day 2 of Mergers and Acquisitions, which for corporate lawyers, is the sexy stuff. The stuff with all the crazy possibilities of hostile takeovers, leveraged buyouts, maneuvering, all-out warfare, discounted cash flows, and the whole gamut of fiduciary duties we've been doing for the past 8 weeks...all crammed into today.

Which is fine. Until I realized at about 8 o'clock that I wasn't going to be done until 10...at which point I realized I wasn't going to be done until midnight...at which point I realized I wasn't going to be done until 2. All said, after freaking out quite a bit, I took my 30 minute walk home at 2 am, 80% done, not entirely sure what I was going to do to be ready by 8:15 in the morning (again, factor in the 30 minute walk, so by 7:45 in the morning.) All said and done, I went to bed at 3:30, planning to get up at 5:45 to finish the rest of the assignment (by that point, reading the material was taking 3 times as long b/c I had gone stupid.) So, I set my cell phone alarm clock for three separate times to be sure I would get up...placed my alarm clock on the bookshelf away from bed to be sure I didn't turn it off unconsciously, and fell asleep 30 minutes later....stupid fuckin coffee.

I woke up at 7. An hour and 15 minutes late. But I felt good! I musta just finished my first rem cycle, thankfully. So I hurriedly read through 30 pages of material and two cases, hoping we wouldn't get to them...drank an enormously strong cup of coffee, and headed off to class.

Now I'm not generally shy about speaking in front of large groups of people. But I am "shy" about being asked a question I don't even understand in front of 100 people in a cavernous classroom...having to turn my microphone on (yes, personal microphones) and sit there in silence because I don't even know what's going on...let alone how to answer his question...even more so on a day when I can't pretend I'm not prepared. This situation is exacerbated by the fact that by all appearances, 95% of the time when the professor calls on somebody...he gets the answer he wants (about 60% of the time when he does that in class, I have no idea what the answer is.) Furthermore, the first time I was on panel...I totally fucked it up. Whenever he asked me a question, I blubbered out some rapid-fire, confused string of words that didn't make any sense...filled with qualifiers like "presumably" and "theoretically" and "realistically" and all of those stupid words you throw in to hedge against being wrong. Terrible.

But today was not that day. Not to say I performed wonderfully. Or that I blew them away. Or that anyone had any idea who was answering the questions. But I was tolerable! I mean. Passable! Nondescript! It was fantastic.


(Actually, to be totally honest, I think I did alright because I got a few questions that I was specifically ready to answer...and one answer that just popped right into my head. Gotta love that.) Oh yeah...and this is just a reward for getting through that:

A Big Decision.

Instead of studying for my accounting exam, which is in 3 hours, I have instead made a decision.


Since the Tard has an enormous new television, contrary to the wishes of girlfriends around the world, I am going to bring my playstation back to St. Louis, even if just to play for 5 minutes, kick SJBs ass, put him in his rightful "_ _ _" place, and eat some Turkey in triumph. (that's me on top. King of the motherfuckin mountain.)


I propose that we play for the drumstick. Anyone else in? (Do you even like drumsticks?)

Protect Your Banana!

So, you know how gmail always has those little advertisements above the inbox? This was the most recent one...which I just found, a little bizarre. The bizarreness, I believe, is self-evident.

Protect your Banana - www.ProtectYourBanana.com - Bananas are Sensitive things, Take Care of yours Today.

I couldn't tell if it was real or not...but I decided to share the love with you. These things are almost 8 dollars a piece.

Thank God I have an offer.

Last night was the lavish firm dinner of SASMF, at the French Bistro Mistral.

So, gussied up in my third-world outfit of Indian Made blue suit, and Indian made striped shirt, I wandered off to meet up with another transfer student to partake in awkward conversation and unnecessary indulgence. Arriving fashionably late (to ensure that I wouldn't make the same mistake of showing up RIGHT on time and be forced to mingle with people for an hour and a half before dinner...), we soon found ourselves standing next to the bar, me with a bordeaux, and he with an expensive scotch.

To be absolutely honest, I like SASMF people better than I like the people from other firms. They're more real world, rough and tumble, social, and interesting than those from the rest. I mean, I had interesting conversations...and as the wine continued to flow...I increasingly lost track of how many I had finished off. I babbled, I laughed inappropriately, I asked very pointed questions (asking a half-black, half-white man why he had an African name...believing he was just a white dude), I talked mad shit about firms, and I believe that the volume of wine I consumed simply meant that I was either 1) incredibly social and interesting to talk to, or 2) a drunken mess not even clear about what he was asking or saying.

It wasn't until I stood up to go to the bathroom that I realized that I was drunk. Like really drunk. I mean you sit down at these tables and you eat a 7 course dinner of some odd sort, and they just keep pouring you wine, even if you're not paying attention. It's just a continuous onslaught of alcohol. As is indicated by the title of this post, thank God I have an offer...and thank god I'm probably not going to take this one.

And in all honesty, I'm not really sure why I feel such an aversion to this firm. I actually think the people are great, warm, funny, and really interesting (I interviewed with a half-Indian, half-white girl who was raised in Beijing, and then went to work in an orphange in Argentina before working in finance with SASMF), and the guy who sat next to me was clearly only in it for 3 years before wanting to go into electoral politics...having been a middle school teacher for 2 years. (I know this because he leaned over and said "I'm only going to be here for 3 years.") And they're all fun, and they seem to like their lives, and they're well adjusted people. And that's definitely not something that's easy to find amongst these firms.

In any case...I came home with a pounding headache, drunk, sloppy, with an apartment in complete disarray, and an Accounting final exam on Monday. So I talked to my baby on Skype, could barely keep my head up, and went to bed. But not before I smashed my head on a window sill while lying in bed. That pissed me off.


That's all. I'm just putting off my work.

Refer to the "Stupid" Post comments...

(This is irrelevant to anyone and everyone but SJ Boy...Unless you just happen to be interested in whether Baby Jessica is Hot(t) or not(t))

Stupid.

This is a non-political post. Yay!

Anyway, this is for law students mainly...

Do any of you ever feel like you aren't able to absorb legal arguments when people say them out loud? Whenever I go to a speech, or in a lecture, or just general classroom time, I generally don't have enough of an idea of what's going on to speak confidently or dig into the issues. Someone will say something with tons of implications, and they no longer appear in my head. I just draw a complete blank. Actually, increasingly it's happening with readings too. I have to read things 3 or 4 times before I have the slightest clue what's going on.

It may just be because I haven't been resting, and my mind is rebelling against me...but I'm increasingly under the impression that I'm just a total moron when it comes to actively dealing with the law. Maybe it's classes here, maybe it's burnout, or maybe I am just an idiot...but I'm increasingly under the impression that my apparent ability in the law is a complete fluke. I am totally going to be sitting in front of a client one day and have absolutely no idea what he's talking about, and it's going to fuck me and everyone else over.

I dunno. But I feel really stupid all the time these days.

Slowly...

30 Seats in the House?
South Dakota rejects the abortion law?
First Muslim Elected?
First woman speaker of the house?
An enormous fuck you to Bush?
Second black governor in history?
Schwarzenegger with a 30% margin mandate?

The three gay marriage bans and 5 pending are not so great. In fact they're hideous...but there's hope.

I'm no longer 100% cynical about the American electorate. It's down to 80% or so. 2004 nearly broke my faith in anything.

My Sentiments Exactly...

Today's the day...in the following clip, just pretend that Cleveland is referring to the election or America...or whatever...Joe's reaction is pretty much mine for the day. (I believe that my old Duke pals are the only ones who will probably truly appreciate this.)



We depart with the words of Andrew Sullivan:

[I]n this election, I think it's vital if you're a true conservative or independent to grit your teeth and vote Democratic. This White House does not respond to measured or reasoned criticism. They need a metaphorical two-by-four in the face.

Tommy-boy style. Amen.

Mel Gibson? Not so much.

Referring to the "Throw the Jew Down the Well" video, this is an excerpt from commentary and discussion about Borat's anti-semitism.

Borat was not exposing some astonishing secret about the fact that racism and anti-Semitism is funny and enjoyable in moderate doses. And it's not terribly frightening that a lot of people despise the Jews, usually out of envy or jealousy. I'm not even a big fan of Baron-Cohen, but if it were me in that situation, I'd sure as hell be singing along with that song and probably think nothing of it. And I have a few Jewish pals I'm sure who would do the same.

It's nothing new or surprising, I just love that there's somewhat out there willing to openly publish the truth of truths: "Anti-Semitism is funny and enjoyable in moderate doses....And I have a few Jewish pals I'm sure who would do the same." It's the new John 3:16.

A Not So Beautiful Mind

It's abundantly obvious that I suck at math. Since third-grade when my teacher specifically set up a conference with my mother to explain that I was falling behind my classmates. Apparently natural ability got me through first and second grade, but that no longer cut it in the big 3. She handed my mother the assignments I had not completed: 8 days worth of math homework. And the rest is history. Nothing plagued me worse in school than math. (Actually, upon closer reflection, even though I took advanced classes, I struggled in school from 3rd-9th grade. I was the academic failure of the family.) Let's be perfectly frank here: If I were good at math, I would currently be in Med School.
Yet, I've noticed over the course of my accounting class that because of simple arithmetic relationships between the balance sheets, accounts, relationships between certain cash flows and certain other figures on income and such...I was forced to think in ways I never had to think before (although upon reflection they were startlingly simple.) And it is difficult, but after the flash of understanding and mini-epiphanies about the relationships, I feel like I've burned a new groove into my thought processes. A completely new way of thinking. In a minor respect, I think that this is the same type of radical push that happens when a political scientist or lawyer is forced to learn economics for the first time. Adding the quantitative aspects of a qualitative problem create an entirely new dimension of understanding...a shift from seeing the world in 2D to seeing it in 3D. (My own meager economics understanding has now been downgraded to such an extent that I think I'm seeing the world in 2.2D, or maybe 2.5D. Certainly not a 3.)

The more I think about it, the more I wonder if my inability to do math is something I've conditioned myself to believe, a self-fulfilling prophecy. Up to this point I have been quite unwilling to consider math and quantitative modes of analysis on by vaguely and automatically invoking the hokey principle that "I suck at math." And it's true. And I've sucked more and more at it as, with the exception of the econ minor which I barely barely understood, I've ignored it for the past (holy shit) 7 years. I didn't even challenge it after I made that choice in 3rd grade. I've let an entirely crucial and integral aspect of understanding and analysis go to seed because I've actually been too lazy to face up to the challenge of struggling with it. That needs to be fixed.

Of course, this will putter out within a week's time as I try to do a geometry problem and end up crying and drunk in my bathtub, but I think it's time I sucked it up and stopped running from important things and pretending that there is some principled reason for my lazy aversion.

The question that lingers though, is the role of natural ability in mathematical thinking, which has always kept me away from it. Part of me is entirely aware that any mental ability, agility, and the force of intellect is something that has to be honed, to be developed, and that requires constant challenge. (This is hopefully what I will adhere to.) The other part of me clearly recognizes that mathematical geniuses in the extreme, are born, not bred. Anybody?

Tuesday.

I'm not hyper-political when it comes to actual electoral politics...but I believe that I am fairly, or at least above-average on current events, policy, and important issues in government and governance. That being said, I'm going to beg you all to vote democrat this year. Because it's not about the individual. It's not about their positions. It's about the party. And it's not about supporting the Democratic Party. It's a referendum on the Republican Party. The real election is coming up in 2 years, at which point the real direction of the country will have to be re-determined...This is an election to punish the corrupt, to educate the hypocritical, to remove the incompetent, and to revive some sense of an ethos driven by something more than power. There is no way this country can withstand another mandate for what has happened over the past 2-6 years. There is no way we can approve of what's been happening over the past few years, of the party in control of all 3 branches of government, of the politics of division, hatred, and fear. (I'm a little drunk.)

But...I have a feeling that out of the readers of this blog, all 1.5 of you, most won't be voting (which I actually don't hold against you in any way, although I find it interesting that I associate with so many educated people who don't vote...which leads me to wonder who IS voting?) And the ones who do...probably vote in parts of the country where it's pretty clear what the turnout will be. (Massachussets, Georgia, New York, California, South Carolina. You Missourians with the McCaskill/Talent race, however...are in a different position.)

In any case...I really don't think I can take another Republican victory this year. I just won't even know what to think. Isn't ANYTHING better than this?

Da da da Da da....news bits.

1) Ted Haggard. Oh the joy. For those of you who've seen "Jesus Camp" or followed the evangelical political movement...this is a goliath. Slightly below Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and James Dobson, there is no more wonderful person that could have been outed for sex with male prostitute and use of crystal meth than Ted Haggard. It's a warm fuzzy. Scrumptious. Shall we take bets on whose next?

2) Saddam Hussein. Not quite sure how I feel about this one. Is this 2006's "October Surprise" (yes I know it's November) that he's been sentenced to death? I mean, sure, it could be coincidental, but is it really possible to believe that these sorts of propitious coincidences during a potentially catastrophic election are accidental or just lucky? I make no judgments, but I'm so cynical about the GOP that it only gives me more reason to be sure I vote.

And if somehow the Republicans maintain their majority, this will be the second time in 2 years that I will completely despair that Americans could really be THIS stupid. I remember sitting in absolute shock in Bangalore in '04 as the results came in for Bush. And as 11 states took the time, energy, and initiative to pass outright bans on gay marriage. Not supporting their rights, or protecting their families, or doing something in any real self-interest, but just taking the time to go out of their way to actively deny rights to a group of people. I was incredulous. I honestly did not think it was possible. I'm holding my breathe for the party of mediocrity and no ideas to sweep Congress in lieu of the party of hypocrisy and terrible ideas.